Mad Uncle HOP Opens Swindle-Care Reform At A Theater Near You

Posted on | October 15, 2009 | No Comments

by Xelan Bonn (www.xelanbonn.com)

Today, I’m giving away a new Rolls Royce to everyone who makes less than $30k a year, goes the equivalent promise of the Dem Party’s healthcare proposals. However, and this is the big proviso, I have to steal from your kids’ future and their prosperity, and from their grandkids, and from their grandkids in order to pay for your new car today—but I’m not going to tell you that, instead, I’m going to pound fear into you and ridicule everyone who does not agree with my take down America mentality!

My name is Mad Uncle HOP, an acronym for Uncle Sam’s bastard children—Harry Reid, Barrack Obama, and Nancy Pelosi, the Damien-like chaos spreaders of fire under the false flag of compassion and caring for the poor—the destroyers of the American Dream and hopefully America itself.

I will not listen to reason because that does not interest me. I have but one goal and one goal only—to follow the “progressive path” aka the “path of chaos and destruction” that seeks to take down the United States from within using toxic policies, bills, and swindles that ensure America not only has no future, but that it falls in short order—collapsed by moral decay in our schools which those before me planned, degradation of ethics which I have helped spurn, a plethora of false promises, removal of transparency, ridicule of common sense, disdain for the Constitution, acceleration of unsustainable government growth, spending and debt, and a true underlying hate for America and all Americans—especially their children—that I so cleverly disguise as parental love and care wrapped in a false flag message of fundamental change and the outward appearance that I am seeking to help the poor—the group I am actually seeking to iron handedly control thorough government dependence—the group that I am destroying with my actions while my beguiling words shift the focus away to whip cream dreams of a fantasy tomorrow.

I do not care that the US dollar is going to collapse on international markets, or that hyper inflation is coming from my spending, or that my countrymen will increasingly suffer the yoke of poverty and despair for that is my goal—I am a progressive—a chaos spreader disguised as a socialist—whose ideals are based on flawed logic and the supreme knowledge that I, and those who support me, are superior thinkers, hence know better; hence I must dictate to the plebs what will be—and of course, when things go bad—and we know they will because I planned it that way—I will not take responsibly but set blame on the opposition party—the classic escape-goat to cover-up or justify my own bad actions.

Please join me in supporting my healthcare plan, which will increase taxes and thankfully, ensure that the average American will pay an additional $4,000 a year or more for healthcare and insurance coverage when all things are considered—and best of all, I will assure you that you will get less care than you had before while I systematically destroy future resources and access—why—because I need you all to be dependant on me and my socialized system of government that I and my supporters are building—you know, the type of government that worked so well for the Soviet Union—for many of my backers are communist—excuse me, I meant to say “progressives,” whoops, I meant to say “Democrats”.

The average American, thankfully, is an idiot and believe what I tell them to believe. I bombard them with my thought control by working with my progressive corporate supporters who help me control three of the four major news networks used by the public to get the majority of their news so my propaganda machine works rather brilliantly—but for that damn Internet, which I am working to assume control of next—along with that pesky talk radio crap that absolutely has to go—for I will have no competition of ideas and voice, for mine is supreme and God-like so listen to me from on high while I place this thing called your Constitution and Bill of Rights into the shredder—don’t worry, those clinking bones are just the dead soldiers of America turning in their graves, I have not begun shredding people yet—but give me some time.

I command you to take my healthcare bill and accept it whether you know what I am doing to you or not because if you don’t, I will find other ways to destroy you and your country—you know I will and that I have a good track record of doing things against the average American in favor of big business and I will keep doing it. I will keep swindling you, the taxpayer, with massive new debts and give-always and re-distribution of wealth that consumes dollars instead of invests them in our collective future. And I will make you like it—I will smile, I will be charming, I will tell you you’re nuts to listen to Fox News—the only network I have not taken news and opinion control from yet (but I’m working on it)—and I will ensure you see my great iconic image on your televisions each and every day for I am 8 parts salesperson and actor, and 1 part politician, and 1 part criminal—but I will never admit it and you will never be allowed to investigate it or make any charges stick—what a fool are you—stupid indeed—how dare you ask for the president’s legal birth qualification—how dare you think Kenya was not good enough, you racist bastards—your Constitution is evil and you know it!

Now I have to ask you, how can you not love me when I, the world’s best known used-car-salesman, can sell you a healthcare bill disguised as cost reform but that actually ensures costs go up for either insurance premiums, government care, or taxation because I am the world’s greatest shell-gamer—just give me your money and shut the hell up you worthless pleb!

My administration offers the world’s best Kabuki so enter my theater of smoke and mirrors and enjoy tonight’s show…

Welcome to the Mad Uncle HOP theater—tonight’s performance is entitled, “How to Take Down America and Have 30 Million Extremist Liberal (aka Progressives) Americans Demand It”. I love the Third World so much I wanted to bring it here to America (even import it through mass unlawful immigration) so please join me in a big round of applause for the end of freedom and liberty in the name of tyranny and the Holy Ghost Mao and Stalin to which I pledge my undying devotion and emulation. Let’s see if we can all bring down the house tonight!

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